The GuideState foundation course
Start Where You Are
Notice your state. Understand its influence. Choose what should lead next.
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Chapter 1 of 6 · Orientation
Start with something real
You do not need to understand the whole framework before beginning. Bring one ordinary situation, decision or goal that would benefit from a little space to think.
A first experience · optional practice
Discover a little space to choose.
A moment of calm may offer more than relief. As urgency eases, you may find room to notice what you are thinking, consider another possibility and choose how to respond. You will practise using that opening through this course.
You do not have to make yourself calm or empty your mind. Begin with one of the short practices below, or continue if you already have enough room to reflect.
Try a few easy breaths
- Pause somewhere you can comfortably give this your attention. Sit with support if available, and keep your eyes open if you prefer.
- Notice one ordinary breath. If comfortable, let the next few breaths follow a gentle rhythm, breathing in through your nose and out easily through your mouth. Do not force depth or hold your breath.
- Return to ordinary breathing. Notice any change in urgency, tension or attention. A subtle change is enough to explore; no change is also an acceptable observation.
If you feel dizzy, breathless or uncomfortable, stop changing your breathing. Let it return to its ordinary rhythm and use the alternative below, or leave the exercise. If you have a breathing condition or are unsure about suitability, ask your healthcare professional.
Prefer an alternative to breathing?
- Look around and name three ordinary things you can see, or notice a sound or the support of your chair. Choose a sense available to you.
- Briefly describe what is happening now, without deciding what it says about you.
- Notice whether you can consider one other way of approaching the moment.
Now give the opening a purpose.
Ask: What would help me meet this moment? Perhaps curiosity, steadiness, courage or focus. Choose one small expression of it: ask a question, write down the main point or remove one distraction.
You may notice a little room to respond, or no change. Neither prevents you from continuing. You can act thoughtfully while some discomfort remains.
More support: accessing calm and making a little space →
Discover the space. Recognise a choice. Practise using it.
A starting point, not a verdict.
State means how you are feeling and functioning in the moment. You might be tired, tense, distracted, steady, curious or ready for a challenge. More than one can be true. These are descriptions to help you notice, not diagnoses or fixed identities.
You can use this course when you are struggling, when things are going well or when you are preparing for something important. You are learning to notice the conditions you bring to a situation, rather than trying to become a different person before you act.
Choose a manageable example.
Perhaps you want to prepare for a conversation, begin a project, make a decision or respond differently to a familiar pattern. Choose something specific enough to work with today. You may change it later.
“I want to ask for more responsibility at work, but I keep putting off the conversation.” We will return to this example through the course. Your own example can be entirely different.
Choose your pace.
Read a chapter, try a prompt and stop when useful. Writing is optional. You can revisit any chapter or use the tools on their own. If a prompt does not fit your circumstances, leave it or adapt it.
Your workbook · writing is optional
One or two sentences is enough. You can change this as you learn.
For example: understand a situation more clearly, prepare for a conversation, make a decision or take a step towards a goal.
Begin with your life as it is. You do not need a perfect state or a perfect answer.
Chapter 2 of 6 · Notice
Notice your state
Before asking what you should do, notice how you are meeting the situation now.
Describe before you judge.
In chapter one, you explored making a little space. If that helped, notice from that opening now. There is no need to repeat the practice or change your feelings before using State Check-In.
Give yourself a moment to notice your energy, attention and sense of pressure. Is your thinking wide or repetitive? Do you feel rushed, engaged, guarded, distracted or ready? Use your own words. You do not need to explain the cause yet.
Try describing what you notice rather than turning it into a judgement about yourself. “I am finding it hard to focus this afternoon” leaves more room to respond than “I am hopeless at this.” The description can change as your conditions change.
Use State Check-In, or build on what you have already noticed.
If you have not completed State Check-In for this situation, use its guided questions to notice your current condition and consider what might serve you next. The pace you chose in chapter one will carry through.
If you have already completed it, you do not need to repeat it. Use that reflection to answer the workbook prompts below. You can revisit the check-in if your situation or state has changed.
“I’m tired and rehearsing everything that could go wrong. I feel pressed to get the conversation exactly right.” This does not settle whether to ask. It helps identify how the person is approaching the question.
You are free to act while uncomfortable. This step is about making the influence of your state more visible, not waiting until you feel completely calm.
Your workbook · writing is optional
A few ordinary words are enough. There is no preferred answer.
Consider your surroundings, energy, competing demands or interest in the task.
Your state is information to consider, not an instruction you have to obey.
Chapter 3 of 6 · Understand
Understand its influence
Separate what is happening from what your current state may be adding to the picture.
Look at the view, as well as the situation.
The same situation may look different when you are exhausted, hurried, curious or well prepared. Some details stand out while others are easier to miss. That does not make every uncomfortable thought wrong, or every reassuring thought accurate.
Ask what you know, what you are assuming and what information you still need. You do not have to replace a difficult interpretation with a positive one. Look for a fuller, more useful account.
Known: “I have not yet asked for the conversation.”
Interpretation: “My manager will think I am demanding.”
Another possibility: “I do not yet know their response. I can prepare evidence of my contribution and ask what further responsibility would require.”
Keep real conditions in view.
Workload, money, relationships, discrimination, health and other practical circumstances can present real limits. A different state does not remove them. You may need information, another person's perspective or practical support as well as reflection.
The question is not “How can I make this feel good?” It is “What would help me see this more clearly?”
Your workbook · writing is optional
Describe the facts you can currently identify.
It may be reasonable, uncertain or incomplete. You do not have to dismiss it.
You can write a question you need to ask, rather than an answer.
A wider view can include both your experience and the practical facts.
Chapter 4 of 6 · Guide
Create useful conditions
Explore one small change that could support the kind of thinking or action your situation calls for.
Useful does not always mean quieter.
A demanding task may call for energy and focus. A difficult conversation may call for steadiness and openness. A creative task may benefit from curiosity. Consider what would help you meet this particular moment.
Start with something realistically available: reduce one distraction, write down the point you want to make, choose a more suitable time, gather missing information or ask for help. You do not have to force a feeling.
Try State Shift.
The tool guides you through a small, practical adjustment in your conditions or next action. Use it to find some footing, prepare for a task or support a state that is already helping.
“I will stop rehearsing the whole conversation tonight. Tomorrow I will write three examples of work I have taken responsibility for, then ask for a suitable time to talk.” The change is preparation and timing, not a guarantee of confidence or agreement.
After trying something, notice what happened. No change is also useful information. You can choose another adjustment, proceed with support or leave the question for later.
Return to your first practice if useful
Recall the brief breathing or surroundings practice from chapter one. If you have enough room to choose already, move straight to the action. If you want more support, the practical guide can help you explore what suits you.
Choose an adjustment to try.
Use State Shift below, or continue with what you have already noticed.
Your workbook · writing is optional
For example: focus, energy, steadiness, curiosity or openness.
Keep it specific and within your circumstances.
You can return to this prompt later. You do not have to report an improvement.
Support your next step through useful conditions, rather than demanding a perfect feeling.
Chapter 5 of 6 · Guide
Sort control and influence
Use the 3 Bucket Decision Tool to turn a worry, decision or goal into a clearer view of your part in it.
Give your effort a place to go.
When everything feels like your responsibility, it can be difficult to see what action is actually available. Separate your situation into what you control, what you can influence and what you cannot guarantee.
Control: preparing examples, choosing how to ask and listening to the response.
Influence: how clearly the manager understands the request and the options they consider.
Cannot guarantee: their decision, available budgets or the timing of an opportunity.
Try the tool with your own example.
Bring the situation or goal you chose in chapter one. Work through the prompts and choose a useful next step. If something belongs in more than one bucket, separate its parts. You can revise your view.
Leaving an outcome outside your control is not the same as giving up or approving of it. You can care, protect a boundary, seek advice and take your part seriously without promising yourself a result you cannot ensure.
When you return here, note the points that matter most. You do not need to copy every answer.
Your workbook · writing is optional
Think about choices, preparation, boundaries or actions that are yours to make.
Consider conversations, requests, collaboration or the information you provide.
Identify uncertainty and other people's choices without dismissing what matters to you.
Choose your part with care. Allow for the parts that are not yours to decide.
Chapter 6 of 6 · Bring it together
Choose, return and review
Leave with one useful next step and a simple way to return to what you have learned.
Make the next step small enough to use.
Look back at your situation, your state, your assumptions and your three buckets. What is one action that is both useful and realistically available? It might be a conversation, some preparation, a request for support or a decision to wait for specific information.
“Tomorrow morning I will write three examples of my contribution and request a meeting. Afterwards I will review how I approached it, what I learned and what comes next.” The person can act without controlling the manager's answer.
Return without turning it into a test.
Choose a practical time or event for a review. Ask: What happened? What state was I bringing? What helped? What needs adjusting? A difficult outcome is not evidence that you used the course incorrectly.
You can revisit State Check-In, State Shift or the 3 Bucket Decision Tool whenever they are useful. Repetition is about practising awareness and response, not maintaining a permanently ideal state.
A foundation for Guide-Self.
You have practised noticing your state, examining its influence and choosing a response. The deeper Guide-Self Development Course and workbook build on this foundation through values, recurring patterns, the qualities you want to bring and continuing reflection.
Keep your workbook as a starting point. You do not need to understand it all to begin with something useful.
Make the practice easy to recall.
Choose an ordinary occasion, such as before opening a message, to remind yourself: pause, notice, choose. A brief practice may help create room; the next step is deciding what you will do with it. Notice what works without demanding the same feeling every time.
Your workbook · writing is optional
Make it concrete enough that you would know you had done it.
This is a note for you, not an automatic reminder.
Some situations need more than individual reflection.
A sentence or a few words you can return to.
Notice the state. Understand its influence. Choose what should lead next. Then return when useful.
Optional help finding your starting point
If you would like help choosing a pace, try the two optional questions below. They do not assess you or limit your route.
Find a familiar experience or further reading
You do not have to fix yourself before you can begin to guide yourself.
Would recognition help?
Quiet Anxiety explores why capable people can keep functioning while something beneath the surface never fully settles.
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A foundation to return to
You’ve reviewed all six chapters.
Keep the next step you chose, and return when useful. This record reflects the chapters you marked reviewed; it is not an assessment or qualification.
Keep or export your workbook, try the next action you chose and review it when useful. There is no further course you have to take.
For deeper reflection, the paid Guide-Self Development Course and workbook build on this foundation. Explore Guide-Self →